Пример эссе TOEFL с комментариями (TOEFL Writing: Essay) — 2

Good teachers set challenging tasks for their students. Do you agree or disagree with this statement?

I believe all teachers have to challenge their students by preparing corresponding tasks. Only challenge allows students to study well, to gain new knowledge and skills.

First, easy tasks causes boring in the class. Nobody wants to solve trivial problems every day. In this case, students decide that subject is not interesting for them. Even very good teacher is not able to teach people who are sleeping in the class. So, tasks have to be hard.

The second reason why I think tasks should be challenging is that challenge is a very good motivation. If students understand that they can do if they make efforts, they would make it! Everybody likes to play games, challenging task is just a good game for students. They like to play in it and to study this way. 

Finally, only challenge gives us a chance to grow, to increase our ability to solve different problems. Hard tasks gives a possibility to find out something new, to increase skills and to be proud of yourself. Good teachers should provide such problems to their students. 

In the conclusion, I have shown that tasks have to be challenging, it is the only way to study. Some teacher prefer to provide easy and boring problems not because it is better, but it is easy for teacher. So only bad and lazy teachers avoid challenging in the class.

 

Эссе соответствует всем требованиям экзамена TOEFL по структуре. Даны убедительные аргументы, подтверждающие точку зрения автора. На мой взгляд, вывод стилистически недостаточно выдержан, не хватает переходов. Я бы сделала так: «In the conclusion, I’d like to say, that from the above it’s absolutely clear, that tasks…».
Но в тексте довольно много грубых грамматических ошибок, Отсутствие артикля, окончания «s» в некоторых местах, т.д. В данном случае, эти ошибки будут учтены при выставлении баллов как системные, и балл будут снижен.

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