Пример эссе TOEFL с комментариями (TOEFL Writing: Essay) — 4

Думаю, было бы полезно увидеть несколько примеров живых эссе. В конце я рискнула кратко прокомментировать каждое из них.

Compare and contrast your way of life with that of your parents. Which way of life do you think would be more satisfying to future generations.

I live in the country, which has changed about 20 years ago. That change causes a big difference between my way of life and my parents’ one. My generation is more flexible, communicable and hard working, but less romantic than previous generation. I think my way of live is more sufficient for our progeny.
First, I and my friend are more flexible than our parents. Our live contains many turns and changes. We have to change ourselves due to circumstances. I think this ability is very useful in the future when world will changes even faster.
Second reason I believe my way of live is more satisfying to future generations is that our parents are usually not very communicative persons. In contrast, my way of live includes a lot of communication. In the future we will have to reach compromises with others, it requires good relation skills.

Finally, my generation is more pragmatic than the previous one. It means, that our parents were more romantic, but less working people. Such way of live was sufficient in the past, but is not normal for present and even in the future.

In conclusion, I have shown that in my view my way of live is better for future generation in contrast with my parents one. Our generationis more flexible, communicable and pragmatic. These characteristics are very important now, but they will be much more important in the future.

Несмотря на то, что содержание эссе интересное, здесь довольно много грубых грамматических ошибок, за что, думаю, баллы могут быть снижены.

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