Расшифровка:
Waitress: Are you ready to order?
Hugh: Did you say something?
Stephen: No.
Hugh: I thought I heard …
Stephen: I rather think it may have been a member of the restaurant staff.
Hugh: Ah.
Waitress: Are you ready to order?
Hugh: Yes, we are ready to order, thank you. I shall have the melon, followed by the roast lamb.
Waitress Melon, lamb. And you, sir?
Stephen: I shall have soupe de poisson, I think followed by roast lamb also.
Waitress: Fish soup. Lamb.
Stephen: I’m so sorry.
Waitress: Yes?
Stephen: What did you just say?
Waitress: Fish soup, lamb.
Stephen: Mmm. Perhaps I didn’t make myself absolutely clear. I would actually like the soupe de poisson.
Waitress: Soupe de poisson is fish soup.
Stephen: Oh dear.
Hugh: Oh deary me.
Stephen: Was I speaking too quickly for you?
Hugh: You seem to be a little confused.
Stephen: I asked for soupe de poisson.
Hugh: Soupe de poisson.
Waitress: Soupe de poisson is fish soup.
Stephen: No. No.
Hugh: No no no no.
Stephen: I obviously lost you. Soupe de poisson is soupe de poisson.
Hugh: D’you see?
Stephen: One thing cannot be another thing. All right? Now, as you have gone to the trouble of advertising soupe de poisson, and I have gone to the great length of ordering soupe de poisson, perhaps you would be kind enough to bring me some soupe de poisson. Thank you.
Hugh: And some mineral water.
Waitress: Mineral water.
Stephen: What a delightful restaurant.
Hugh: Absolutely delightful.
Waitress: Mineral water.
Stephen: Oh dear.
Hugh: Oh waitress?
Stephen: Waitress?
Hugh: Can you remember what it was that I asked for? I think I saw you write it down, did you write it down?
Waitress: Yes, Mineral water.
Hugh: Bravo.
Stephen: Excellent, well done.
Hugh: But you have brought a bottle of mineral water.
Stephen: Do you see? These are called bottles.
Hugh: We asked for mineral water.
Stephen: Mineral water. Just as you carefully wrote down on your small pad.
Waitress: How much mineral water?
Hugh: Some.
Stephen: Some mineral water I think we asked from you.
Hugh: Some.
Waitress: Some?
Stephen: But we can check precisely what it was we asked for. We do tape our conversations against just such a contingency.
Tape: «Get out the pair of you, you snotty wankers …»
Stephen: No, no. That was the restaurant we were in yesterday.
Hugh: It was a delightful restaurant it was too.
Stephen: Quite delightful. Here we are.
Tape: «And some mineral water. — Mineral water.»
Hugh: You see?
Stephen: Some mineral water.
Hugh: No mention of bottles.
Waitress: Shall I bring it in a jug?
Stephen: Yes, now, you see, young lady, my suggestion to you is that you should bring us mineral water in a jug when we ask for mineral water in a jug, till then, we’d be very grateful if you just brought us some mineral water. Thank you.
Hugh: All right?
Stephen: Thank you.
Hugh: What a delightful restaurant.
Stephen: Simply charming restaurant.
Hugh: Thank you.
Stephen: Delightful.
Hugh: I wonder, my dear, is there a gents’ nearby. I’m rather desperate for a pee.
Waitress: Well … there is one, but it was out of order
earlier on. I’ll just check.
Stephen: Charming waitress, do you see?
Hugh: This is right. Do you understand?
Waitress enters with a small green pea, which she places in front of Hugh.
Hugh: Um …
Stephen: Er …
Hugh: Yes, now, waitress, you must excuse my stupidity, but …
Waitress takes tape recorder.
Waitress: You asked for it. Listen.
Tape: «I’m rather desperate for a pee …»
Hugh: Ah…
Источник: Liveinternet.ru